Have been working for almost 4 months already. Just as expected, working life is really dry and monotonous, I've lost all my life... in the first place, I din't have many friends to begin with. Secondary school only had Esme, Liying ya... then Esme went to UK, Liying went to SRJC and we never kept in contact so that's that... went to JC, close with Daphne and Wenjun and all the band people... but only fascinated with Wenjun... so not many friends... went to Uni, met JianYong, and that's it, neglected Daphne and now she also got boyfriend already, bz with studies... cant even find her...sigh... its good to have a nice caring guy, but when his social circle is just you and his family, you don't get much friends in return... go to church talk a little bit here and there, but never really click in, now seems to have a feeling I'm losing Yy also... quite worried for her, knows she got a great guy, but also pray that she don't rush into things, but somehow I also don't know how to tell her...
everyday go to work, then return home... play a little games online, watch anime and that's that... maybe I should really go out and join some club or something, can't just sit around and wait for life to go on... can't also wait for him to join me, of course hope he would like to join me, but he thinks too much... this one expensive, that one too tiring, this one not practical... so that's that... I hope really to go for some fun classes sometimes, like Latin dance, belly dance or archery or golf... but it seems that he's not that kind of inspired... oh no! what do I do with such a person!
that's y maybe I like to watch tv shows esp... recently just finished watching hana-kimi, coz firstly it's brainless... just need to watch dunneed to think so much, secondly it seems that i've entered a total diff world... i think since young, i love to read and imagine, I can imagine myself being the character, being in a different world... these keep me alive... that's why when a show or book ends, I have to return back to this world, I feel sad and lost...
thanks to Lynette at work, I also never get to really interact with others coz I only go to lunch with her, not that I don't like, but I think sometimes, its good to go with the rest also... can't really get to know more ppl in office, like stella has alot of friends from the various depts... I hope to know more ppl too...
I also want to learn to talk to ppl better, somehow I feel that I'm still abit unfriendly on the phone, must learn to talk better...
everyday, i ponder over the same things... sigh...
planning for wedding? of coz i hope to have some motivation to save for a house, a car, a family... but judging at this stage... i doubt so... i told him straight... I want to get married in a church, the guy must be baptized and committed in church... maybe I really need to try hard enough to let go... almost there... but somehow still pull it back...
everyday go to work, then return home... play a little games online, watch anime and that's that... maybe I should really go out and join some club or something, can't just sit around and wait for life to go on... can't also wait for him to join me, of course hope he would like to join me, but he thinks too much... this one expensive, that one too tiring, this one not practical... so that's that... I hope really to go for some fun classes sometimes, like Latin dance, belly dance or archery or golf... but it seems that he's not that kind of inspired... oh no! what do I do with such a person!
that's y maybe I like to watch tv shows esp... recently just finished watching hana-kimi, coz firstly it's brainless... just need to watch dunneed to think so much, secondly it seems that i've entered a total diff world... i think since young, i love to read and imagine, I can imagine myself being the character, being in a different world... these keep me alive... that's why when a show or book ends, I have to return back to this world, I feel sad and lost...
thanks to Lynette at work, I also never get to really interact with others coz I only go to lunch with her, not that I don't like, but I think sometimes, its good to go with the rest also... can't really get to know more ppl in office, like stella has alot of friends from the various depts... I hope to know more ppl too...
I also want to learn to talk to ppl better, somehow I feel that I'm still abit unfriendly on the phone, must learn to talk better...
everyday, i ponder over the same things... sigh...
planning for wedding? of coz i hope to have some motivation to save for a house, a car, a family... but judging at this stage... i doubt so... i told him straight... I want to get married in a church, the guy must be baptized and committed in church... maybe I really need to try hard enough to let go... almost there... but somehow still pull it back...
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